I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
