I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
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