Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
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