hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
ttyl tear gas
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Randomize
