I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
