Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
