I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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