I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
