is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
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I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
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I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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