I will die if light touches me.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
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