He kissed a someone with a penis
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Randomize
