god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
