I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Randomize
