I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
