3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
Me. At least after what I've been through.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
