His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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