Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
