So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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