You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I am one with the molecules
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize