Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
