what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
