Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
