The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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