apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize