guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Randomize
