happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize