I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
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