I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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