Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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