Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sick fucks of a feather flock together
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize