Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Randomize
