its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
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Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
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It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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