Ambien. No doubt about it.
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I have surprise drugs for everyone
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
