My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Randomize
