I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
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