I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
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