thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
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