Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
