Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
