what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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