My pussy is not your playground.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
