3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
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