im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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