"it" just moved
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
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