If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
