I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
...so i touched it.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
