Nicole vs. Life
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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