oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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