Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
