hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
We left an ass print on the piano.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
